i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize