it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
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