I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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