Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
