So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Who did Billy Mays play for?
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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