She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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