Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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