she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
