My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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