make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
