Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
