a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Randomize