we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Also, beer. Big fan.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Randomize
