I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize