I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
