so explain again why im purple
no
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
