My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
