Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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