I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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