I think i peed on brittanys purse
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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