This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
