I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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