i barfeds in our rink
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
