she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
