it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
