fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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