My brain says no but my pants say off.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
