My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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