Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
