Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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