is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
