I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
