It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
