Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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