Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Randomize
