I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
vagina is talking i cant
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
