nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
