I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize