May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
