I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
