i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
