people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize
