they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
