he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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