I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
ugly people sure do ruin things
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
