If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
