omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Farmville is her only friend.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
