Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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