That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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