i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
