In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize